Flashback

Today is the 30th of November. 2007. Something has happened in my family just recently that I will not share here. Then again, i will be grateful for it because in the long run, it will bring happiness if all goes well. The week has been pretty boring except for this piece of news that i recieved just at dinner. Monday was spent at the park, Tuesday was spent thinking about monday, Wednesday was spent dreaming, Thursday was spent tuitioning, and today was spent pretty much on everything. 8.30 in the evening and there are 2 things on my mind. My family and a few special friends of mine.

I'm starting to think more about others since Con3 camp. I set myself a goal in life. To make others feel happy. Feel peace and love. That was why i wanted to become a film director. Since many people watch films to pass the time, hang out, I shall make films for people. Hopefully providing some sense of insight, happiness and love for my viewers. If that does'nt work, I would try my luck in the music business with whatever band i may have. I pain when i think about the pains others are going through. During sharings in the camp, I did keep a few trivial problems to myself because I realise that my problems are nothing compared to what my friends had.

A quick look back on my life. I had my first crush when I was 11 years old. A young age for a boy. I cant remember her face now. Let alone what she is doing for the time being. It was a leadership camp. The first I have ever attended. I remember claiming best camper award for that camp. It did feel good. Then, I fell out of the crush. It was a year before i felt again. PSLE was on it's way and i had just rejoined the faith. She was in cathecism class and was also the most beautiful girl i have ever met IMO. She's changed though. Not the same anymore. I remember NOT studying for PSLE, having my first fight, having my best friends go against me, had little faith, geeky and basically no life when i was 12.

Sec 1 came alot of new things. New school, new responsibilities, new girl in my life, new friends, new house, new cricketing skills. New everything. I cut my initially long hair short and has been since then. I was still crap in chinese and we were all very naive back then. We could take over the world in our dreams. That is if my dreams werent filled with a girl i had a huge crush on for the rest of the year. I met her in Con1 camp. Honestly, I dont really want to talk about it.

Sec 2. What a year. besides getting straight As for doing close to minimum (homework), I also adopted a new attitude. I was going to break out of my borders. I soon became a guy no one would have recognised. No longer shy, no longer geeky, no more late nights fantasising about things that would never happen. I made my best friends in this year. John, Lisa, and a few others to mention. I drew back and kicked hard at life. Turns out it worked. Also increased my spiritual life here. LOM was soaring for me and alot of other things were going well. Though i admit, i DID have another crush here.

Sec 3. This year. I have mixed feelings about this year. Firstly, studies were a bummer. Besides increasing study pace by 100x which really isnt much, i still only managed to scrape through triple science and double maths. Whats the point of studying this stuff anyway? I'm not gonna be a computer guy or a biologist at any rate. I wished i took literature. It felt so much better doing that. Then again, this year was a great year in the social and spiritual circles of my life. My best friends, half of them i realised were girls. I was a peer leader, and I became a cathecist in church. A lot happened so far this year. Too much to account for. Maybe one day i wiil write a whole post on this year. All in all, I feel good now if a bit emotionally tired.


There are so many things I have to be thankful for. A wonderful family, A wonderful group of friends who i can rely on, fantastic days in my life, love, peace. As i look back on the shore, I see how many footsteps have been made. Each pair side by side. The number of people that have joined me in this magnificent journey. I can only hope that when i look to my side, they will all be there. Wearing smiles on their faces. Each with their own journey to make. And I know not all will be here when the time comes for their journey to take them somewhere else. So all i can do, is to treasure them now. Treasure the footsteps left behind before the tide washes it all away.

For all whom have influenced me, thank you. You make the difference that means so much to me. Thank you. Grazie.

Markyc

Lifetime (part 2)

We went cycling yesterday. I cycled all the way from home. Went pass bedok camp, took the dodgy underpass after cycling 1km eastbound, went all the way to macdonalds only to find that i'm the first one there. Christine and Grace came next followed by Ryan and Jerome, then Joel, Catherine, Gericho, Gable, Eugene, Uncle Gabriel and last but not least, Cassandra, Steph, and Joan. It rained and gabriel was a walking mop. Which had jus mopped up the rain so a walking mop isnt a good thing. Made a lake in macs. The rain easedoff once the 3 girls came so we went off cycling. Was cycling aufully close to Steph half the time. So i decided to play and swerve left and right. Made her nervous =P It eventually knocked her off her bike. I was cycling not doing anything, tho a bit close, then she crashed into my side. Fell on her side, her bike was all over her. Felt bad after that. We were at bedok jetty b4 that. Just talking. It was a very talkative cycling session. Told her abt my parents' divorce and all that. She took to it pretty well i think.

Cassandra looked very nervous on the bike. I mean she wasnt like wearing that gleaming smile she always had. Stopped at lagoon for a quick drink b4 bringing the bikes back. Grace couldnt ride so she had a double bike with gabriel, who later swapped with jerome for his own bike to chase after Eugene, whom i beat 3 times in 3 different races. =P Then we went bowling. I didnt join in cos it was already 420. Steph left followed by gable. Then I left at 430. Joan accused me of leaving early cos steph wasnt there anymore. grrr.

I suppose life is like a long cycling trip. When we first start off, we are so unconfident in whatever we do with the bike. So we need help from others. After a while we get a bit more confident and explore new ways to cycle. Once in a while we will meet new partners willing to journey with us. Some for long, some for short, some for the rest of the trip. Like life when we make friends. Some will be easily forgotten yet some will remain in our hearts forever. Sometimes these friends may be a nuiscance and try to play with you, knocking you off ur bike. Then they will turn around and attend to your wounds. Some wounds will not be healed, some will but in the end, it wil be a learning experience so that we dont make the same mistake again. When we meet that special companion in our journey, We would want to spend the rest of the time with that person and do whatever it takes to make that person happy. We can also teach him or her how to ride better and probably ask him or her to become a cycling partner. When that person does, you know you will never be alone in life.

The scenery and the people we meet is just one representation of what life can be like. Taking the path less taken will bring us places we would have never seen and meet people many would never have met. We take rests to cool down and have a chat. Sometimes the chat is special to that person and you would have gained a follower. When u reach the destination, look back on the cycling trip. Has it been worth your while? Have you chronicled a moment that would come only once in a lifetime.

Lifetime (part 1)

I had con3 camp about a week ago. I went there expecting to meet new people and have fun, i ended up in touch with GOD. It was at CAYC. again. Nothing much new except that the adoration room looked really nice. On the first day, we had a skit in which so many consequences would occur. GOD was a girl as well. =P ANYWAY, after the skit, we had camp food lunch i think. What came after was the journey thing. kinda like a scavenger hunt but for instances of GOD. Steph must be the only girl who has the ability to be MORE spontaneous than I am. First hugging me on stage, the running all over the place talking in chinese to random ppl asking for their photo to complete our game. We had a few sharings but the details will remain undisclosed because some of it might be sensitive subjects to others. Steph left on the 2nd night tho. After the last sharing. Then there were footprints. Like a huge sharing session where i cried. I think i cried for those who cried in the sharings. I once said that I had the inablilty to cry for others but in the end, i did. For 3 ppl who had the courage to cry in front of strangers. I really felt for them. Honest. When u are right beside a person when they cry, u can feel their pain. I could. It formed a lump in my throat. After that, I fully devoted myself to GOD and to my aim in life to make people feel happy.

The days following the camp were good. I talked to group members like joan, got to know them better. I had tuition for 4 days and thomas gave me a crap study schedule which i dont think i will, CAN, follow. Then Alan came to me asking me to form a committee for a christmas party on the 21st of dec. So i called all he IKEA members back to my place and we had a meeting on saturday. Sarah Liew and Joel De Cruz was there as well. So we had our meeting and I got ino a fit of laughter again after so long. After the meeting on the function room, we went to my place and 10 ppl, crampedup in my room, talked. I remember where most of them sat. Steph and Joan were nearest the door, Cat and Gericho were sitting by the cupboard, Gabriel was almost under my table, Keown was on my bedside with joel and a few others. Then we had dinner at the hawker centre where Steph joan, keown and I gobbled up a pizza and a few satay sticks. We made our way to church for youth mass soon after. I kept suddenly stopping in front of the 2 girls so steph tried to push me into the drain =P
Met Steph's dad that night. She offerend a ride back to dad's place cos i had no idea how to get back via the church. How nice of her.

Since this post is getting long,i will publish part 2 later today.

Arrows - Lyrics

This is a song that I had in my head a couple of months already. It's basically about being there for loved ones. The first line, represents the action of asking for help. Like arrows being fired into the sky and its wielder having faith that it wil hit it's target. This shows that we will fly for as long as it takes to "see your smile" because to me, that was my target. If my speakers were'nt busted, I'd gladly record it for you but for now, it's just between a few ppl who have heard it already. Funny thing is, they didnt know. haha

So whatever interpretation you have for my song, I hope you can relate to it as it did to me. Of course it has to relate to me its my song =P. Enjoy!

Verse

Shoot me straight into the sky
Let me join the falling stars
Soaring slowly through the clouds
Cities flying past


Chorus
On and On…..Through the Sun
Across horizons… Till im done

Verse

Feathers Floating in angry skies
Arrows, Flying across the seas
Got the apple on my head
Gliding past the fields

Chorus
Ill be carrying on… I will run
On and on… through the Sun
Flying on… for you love
Across horizons… Till im done.

Bridge
You know what’s my target
Don’t you know what’s my target
I pray that the sun shines in you eyes
I just want to see your smile…